I’ve got a lot of background anxiety about a lot of things right now. It’s work, other stuff with my family, one of my friends, and of course the election, the pandemic, and the impending doom of climate change. So right now I’ve decided to distract myself by thinking about fancy things because in the world of those fancy things, it is clean, minimalist, refined. Everything is perfectly splendid from my imaginary ivory tower.
So here are some of the things I have either bought or want to buy to distract myself from reality. (Editor’s note: Actually I only really bough the pants and the house painting below, everything else is idle desire.)
Theory linen pull on capris
Having not left the house basically ever for 6 months means all my clothes are tight and I refuse to wear pants without an elastic waist.
Rag and Bone Floral Hoodie
Granted, I have nowhere to where it given that I never leave the house, but I like the pattern. It’s as busy and scattered as my brain is right now, so we match.
The “perfect white sneaker”
Because if I’m going to start dressing like a zoomer, I’m going to need some cool shoes.
Ceremonial grade matcha
I watched a single video of Graham Stephan of all people making an iced matcha latte and now all I can think about is making some iced matcha lattes.
What’s the point of fancy tea if I can’t have the petit fours. No matter that a clump of tiny bite sized pastries shipped in from Minamoto Kitchoan cost approximately the same as a three course meal at a very nice restaurant.
A bakery near us makes the most delicious sachertorte. We got one for our wedding cake. Maybe taking a bite will remind me of those halcyon days when I could actually see people I cared about in person.
Ridiculously expensive candles
These candles are, I kid you not, $85 a piece. Bougie parfumée indeed.
So this started happening to my laptop screen a week ago:
I could just live with it. Or I could pay a few hundred dollars to get the screen replaced. Or I could drop a couple thousand on a new laptop. Or I could just abandon technology altogether and go live in the woods.
Even if I live in the woods, I’ll probably need a phone to constantly scroll through Twitter, lest I forget for a moment my fear and anxiety. My two year old LG Nexus is on its last legs (barely charges, constantly lagging, just kind of a mess in general). Now may be the time for an upgrade.
One of those TVs that look like a framed painting
It looks nice and though there’s really no clear wall space to hang our TV it still is a completely practical idea because #insertreasonshere.
Also my house is a different color now and it cost me $5000.
This is the color my house is now, Benjamin Moore’s “Fairmont Green.”
Note it is much lighter in person. It’s not awful, but I’m still not sure I like it. C’est la vie!
How are you? Any material goods succoring your sense of anxiety and dread?